The Dental Misadventures of Mr. Hank

Chris had his much-dreaded dentist appointment this morning,
and spoke exclusively to me about the experience.

KB: Today, at the age of 29, you endured your first cavity filling.
Were you genuinely frightened? And if so, what part of the
procedure caused you the most duress?

CT: I was more uneasy than frightened. I was most concerned with
the possibility of feeling the drill, meaning the Novocaine wasn't
doing its job. Kinda like the horror stories you read about people
waking up during surgery.

KB: I heard you received some inspirational counsel from
family members. What stories of past dental discomfort
resonated with you the most? What gave you the courage
to open wide without reservation?

CT: It wasn't so much anyone else's past dental stories that worried
me as much as my prior dental experiences. In my mind, I already
dread the cleaning, and this has got to be worse, right?
[My sister-in-law] Mer really helped by telling me how it's
no big deal, as we're on the same wavelength with so many other things.

KB: Describe for our readers the unique technique Dr. Kan
performed to distract you while administering the shot of Novocaine.

CT: She employed a technique where she constantly yanked on
the inside of my cheek (on the side of my mouth with the cavity)
with her finger. The hygienist (who thinks I'm "Mr. Hank") was holding
Mr. Thirsty in the other side of my mouth. I think the idea here is to
make it so there's so much else going on that you don't even realize
the shot is taking place.

KB: I've heard the smell from the drill cutting through teeth can
be bothersome. Was this something you noticed?

CT: I noticed no smell.

KB: You listened to your iPod throughout. What were
you listening to?

CT: The rare "Enhanced EP" from Wilco. It's a short tracklist that
goes a little something like this: A Magazine Called Sunset,
Bob Dylan's 49th Beard, Handshake Drugs, Kamera,
More Like the Moon, Woodgrain. The procedure was over
before Handshake Drugs!

KB: What were you thinking about during the procedure?

CT: I tried to lose myself in the soothing sounds of Jeff Tweedy
and Wilco but I couldn't really get the thought of the drill grinding
away at my tooth out of my head. Even though I couldn't feel a
thing I kept waiting for something that would propel me out of that chair.

KB: Compare a cavity filling to a standard cleaning.

CT: In the end it was quicker and more painless. They didn't employ
the scraping pick thing once!

KB: What was the worst part about undergoing the procedure today?

CT: The $100 deductible.

KB: What did the procedure teach you about dental care?

CT: Be sure to get a cleaning every six months!